Funny Council Complaints

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Funny Council Complaints

Post  Aerius on Sun Aug 02, 2009 10:28 am

UK Council complaints Council complaints - These are genuine clips from council
complaint letters

1. My bush is really overgrown round the front and my back passage has
fungus growing in it.

2. He's got this huge tool that vibrates the whole house and I just can't take it

3. It's the dog mess that I find hard to swallow.

4. The man next door has a large erection in the back garden, which is unsightly and dangerous.

5. I want some repairs done to my cooker as it had backfired and burnt my knob off.

6. And their 16 yr old son is continually banging his balls against my fence.

7. I wish to report that tiles are missing from the outside toilet roof. I think it was bad wind the other night that blew them off.

8. My lavatory seat is cracked, where do I stand?

9. Please send a man with the right tool to finish the job to satisfy my wife.

10. Our lavatory seat is broken in half and is now in three pieces.

11. I request permission to remove my drawers in the kitchen.

12. Our kitchen floor is damp. We have 2 children and would like a third, so please send someone round to do something about it.

13. I am still having problems with smoke in my new drawers.

15. Will you please send a man to look at my water - it is a funny colour and not fit to drink.

16. I have had the clerk of works down on the floor 6 times but I still have no

17. I want to complain about the farmer across the road, every morning at 6 a.m.
his cock wakes me up and it's now getting too much for me.

18. I wish to complain that my father hurt his ankle very badly, then he put his foot in the hole in his back passage.

19. 50% of the walls are damp, 50% have crumbling plaster and 50% are plain filthy.

20. I am a single woman living in a downstairs flat and would you please do something about the noise made by the man on top of me every night.

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Re: Funny Council Complaints

Post  kristap on Sun Sep 27, 2009 5:15 am



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Re: Funny Council Complaints

Post  Sanshez on Sun Sep 27, 2009 12:01 pm

O my sack!! that is funny!

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Re: Funny Council Complaints

Post  Aimee on Fri Jan 22, 2010 12:41 pm


i just had to bump this.
i had to read them all like 2 times before getting them xD

what do they mean with erection in 4? (its clearly not the mans boner) lol


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